Among patrilineal communities, Sambandam was present only among younger Namboothiris and some Iyers of Palakkad, and as a male-mediated informal marriage. It's etymology is said to be from the Sanskrit word combination of either Sat-Bandham(Good Relationship) or Sammada-Bandham(Consensual Relationship).
Ceremonies involved in a Sambandham function
Despite popular myths spread since Kerala Renaissance, Sambandam was not a mere living together process. It included some ceremonies just like in common marriages. Sambandham is known by different names in Kerala. One of them is Putamuri/Pudamuri.
The preliminary ceremony in every Putamuri, is the examination of the horoscopes of the bride and the bridegroom by an astrologer. This takes place in the house of the bride, in the presence of the relations of the bride and bridegroom. The astrologer, after examination, writes down the results of his calculations on a piece of palmyra leaf with his opinion as to the fitness or otherwise of the match, and hands it over to the bridegroom's relations, If the horoscopes match with each other, a day is then and there fixed for the celebration of the marriage. This date is also written down on two pieces of cadjan, one of which is handed over to the bride's Karanavan, and the other to the bridegroom's relations. The astrologer and the bridegroom's party are then feasted in the bride's house, and the former also receives presents in the shape of money or cloth called Pudava ; and this preliminary ceremony, which is invariably performed
at all Putamuris in North Malabar, is called 'Putamuri Kurikkal' or Pudava Kodukkal.
Some three or four days prior to the date fixed for the celebration of the Putamuri, the bridegroom visits his Karanavans and elders in caste to obtain formal leave to marry. The bridegroom on such occasion presents his elders with betel and
nuts, and obtains their formal sanction to the wedding. On the day appointed the bridegroom proceeds, after sunset, to the house of the bride, accompanied by a number of his friends. He goes in procession, and is received at the gate of the house
by the bride's party, and is conducted with his friends to seats provided in the tekkini, or southern hall of the house. There the bridegroom distributes presents (danam) or money gifts to the Brahmans assembled. After this the whole party is treated to a sumptuous banquet. It is now time for the astrologer to appear, and announce the auspicious hour fixed. He does it accordingly, and receives his dues. The bridegroom is then taken by one of his friends to the padinjatta or principal room of the house. The bridegroom's party has, of course, brought with them a quantity of new cloths and betel leaves and nuts. The cloths are placed in the western room of the house, called padinjatta, in which all religious and other important household ceremonies are usually performed.
This room will be decorated, and turned into a bed-room for the occasion, There will be placed in the room a number of lighted lamps, and Ashtamangaliam, which consists of eight articles symbolical of mangaliam or marriage. These are rice, paddy, the tender leaves of the coconut tree, an arrow, a looking glass, a well washed
cloth, burning fire, and a small round wooden box called ‘cheppu' made in a particular fashion. These will be found placed on the floor of the room aforesaid as the bridegroom enters it. The bridegroom with his groom's-man enters the room through the eastern door. The bride, dressed in rich cloth and bedecked with jewels, enters the room through the western door, accompanied by her aunt or some other elderly lady of her family. The bride stands facing east with the Ashtamangaliam and lit-up lamps in front of her. The groom's-man then hands over to the bridegroom a few pieces of new cloth called Pudava, and the bridegroom puts them into the hands of the bride. This being done, the elderly lady who accompanied the bride, sprinkles rice over
the lit-up lamps, and the head and shoulders of the bride and the bridegroom, and the bridegroom immediately leaves the room, as he has to perform another duty. At the tekkini or southern hall he now presents his elders and friends with betel leaf and nuts. Betel and nuts are also given to all the persons assembled at the place. After the departure of the guests the bridegroom retires to the bed-room with the bride.
This is an unvarnished account of a Putamuri.
The preliminary ceremony in every Putamuri, is the examination of the horoscopes of the bride and the bridegroom by an astrologer. This takes place in the house of the bride, in the presence of the relations of the bride and bridegroom. The astrologer, after examination, writes down the results of his calculations on a piece of palmyra leaf with his opinion as to the fitness or otherwise of the match, and hands it over to the bridegroom's relations, If the horoscopes match with each other, a day is then and there fixed for the celebration of the marriage. This date is also written down on two pieces of cadjan, one of which is handed over to the bride's Karanavan, and the other to the bridegroom's relations. The astrologer and the bridegroom's party are then feasted in the bride's house, and the former also receives presents in the shape of money or cloth called Pudava ; and this preliminary ceremony, which is invariably performed
at all Putamuris in North Malabar, is called 'Putamuri Kurikkal' or Pudava Kodukkal.
Some three or four days prior to the date fixed for the celebration of the Putamuri, the bridegroom visits his Karanavans and elders in caste to obtain formal leave to marry. The bridegroom on such occasion presents his elders with betel and
nuts, and obtains their formal sanction to the wedding. On the day appointed the bridegroom proceeds, after sunset, to the house of the bride, accompanied by a number of his friends. He goes in procession, and is received at the gate of the house
by the bride's party, and is conducted with his friends to seats provided in the tekkini, or southern hall of the house. There the bridegroom distributes presents (danam) or money gifts to the Brahmans assembled. After this the whole party is treated to a sumptuous banquet. It is now time for the astrologer to appear, and announce the auspicious hour fixed. He does it accordingly, and receives his dues. The bridegroom is then taken by one of his friends to the padinjatta or principal room of the house. The bridegroom's party has, of course, brought with them a quantity of new cloths and betel leaves and nuts. The cloths are placed in the western room of the house, called padinjatta, in which all religious and other important household ceremonies are usually performed.
This room will be decorated, and turned into a bed-room for the occasion, There will be placed in the room a number of lighted lamps, and Ashtamangaliam, which consists of eight articles symbolical of mangaliam or marriage. These are rice, paddy, the tender leaves of the coconut tree, an arrow, a looking glass, a well washed
cloth, burning fire, and a small round wooden box called ‘cheppu' made in a particular fashion. These will be found placed on the floor of the room aforesaid as the bridegroom enters it. The bridegroom with his groom's-man enters the room through the eastern door. The bride, dressed in rich cloth and bedecked with jewels, enters the room through the western door, accompanied by her aunt or some other elderly lady of her family. The bride stands facing east with the Ashtamangaliam and lit-up lamps in front of her. The groom's-man then hands over to the bridegroom a few pieces of new cloth called Pudava, and the bridegroom puts them into the hands of the bride. This being done, the elderly lady who accompanied the bride, sprinkles rice over
the lit-up lamps, and the head and shoulders of the bride and the bridegroom, and the bridegroom immediately leaves the room, as he has to perform another duty. At the tekkini or southern hall he now presents his elders and friends with betel leaf and nuts. Betel and nuts are also given to all the persons assembled at the place. After the departure of the guests the bridegroom retires to the bed-room with the bride.
This is an unvarnished account of a Putamuri.
Reference
Malabar Manual by William Logan
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